Ways to avoid divorce

Running your partner a bath, making them a cup of tea and leaving love letters around the house, are all ways to avoid a divorce, according to advice from a relationships campaign. But, do you really think it's the way to prevent a divorce? What things keep your relationship alive? 

Godly Parenting II - Tips

As a sequel to my previous post on Godly parenting I think it will be in order for me to present my personal tips on achieving Godly parenting. 

Lead by example: As they say, what you do is so loud that I cannot hear what you are saying. If we want our children to take God seriously, we must do the same. We must exhibit the lifestyle of a Christian so that our children learn from us. Our children should see us pray as well as praying with us, studying the Bible, going to church, listening in church (we should not give children games like ipads etc. in church; we are telling them church is boring), be a part of church by joining a department, telling the truth, being fair in our dealings etc. 

Pray always: We must pray for our children at all times. My Mum told me recently that she has started to reduce praying for me as she has seen that I am taking God seriously. She has been praying for me for almost 30 years and I have seen the direct results of her prayers. 

My salvation came as a result of her prayers, my Mum prayed for me and blessed me fervently on the 8th of September, 2012 I met my husband the very next day. In many other ways such as success in my education and divine protection, I have seen God move beyond my own prayers and I believe its because I have a praying Mum.

A friend of mine made me to realise that just as we have Angels guarding and guiding our children, their are also demons around that are trying to interfere with their lives. We as parents must continue lifting them up in prayer as Apostle Paul said in Gal 4 vs 19 "My dear children, for whom I am again in the pains of childbirth until Christ is formed in you". We must travail in the place of prayer till Christ is formed in our Children.

The things we should pray for include; developing the fear of God, the love of God, faith in God, having ears that hear God, discovering their purpose in God etc. 

Unity: I believe it is very important for both parents to engage in Godly parenting. This makes the job easier however, in a family with only one serious Christian the onus is on that parent to work hard through God's grace to nurture their children in the way of God. 

It is important that Christian fathers do not leave the instilling of Godly instructions only to their wives. The scripture below shows that both parents should be involved in the process of teaching. 

Proverbs 1:8-9 Hear, my son, your father’s instruction, and forsake not your mother’s teaching, for they are a graceful garland for your head and pendants for your neck.

I believe there are numerous tips on Godly parenting. The websites below have information which buttresses the points I have made above. I pray God will en-grace us to be the best parents ever. Amen

http://familyfortress.org/2013/05/15/ten-keys-to-raising-godly-children/

http://www.whatchristianswanttoknow.com/20-important-bible-verses-for-parents/#ixzz38a1NBxlU

Godly Parenting

My personal desire as a Christian is to ensure that I pass onto my offspring the love and faith that I have found in God. I would want my children to understand that the purpose of their creation is to be an extension of God on earth and to establish His will.

A recent TV documentary on the decline of Christianity within British society, stated that future generations are less likely to be committed Christians as there is a decline with each passing generation.

I think this trend is unique to Christianity as opposed to other religions where you find that parents pass their religious belief and practices on to their children who in turn pass this on to their own children. At a bank in Abuja I saw a boy of about 3 years taking the Muslim prayer posture this was very remarkable to me and I think Christian parents have to take a leaf out of the books of others to achieve Godly parenting.

When does Godly parenting start? I believe it starts from the moment of conception. We should engage the unborn one in our daily routine as Christians such as praying, praising, Bible study and church attendance. 

As Proverbs 22 vs 6 puts it perfectly "Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it". If we do not train up our children in a Godly way we should not expect anything else when they are grown. 

Parenting Courses. Are they necessary?

For the most part of educational lives, we learn how to be successful in a chosen career or vocation. The tools we gain in education hardly prepare us for things like relationship, marriage and parenting.

Generations before us did not resort to classes to learn how to be parents. This does not negate the fact that their are skills required to make a good parent.

The question is if we should entrust the raising of the next generation in seemingly "untrained hands" or should we encourage and engage in parenting classes to gain the skills needed to execute the role of a parent?

I am personally keen on learning the skills that will aid me in being a good parent even if it comes in the form of parenting courses.

Would you be open to parenting classes?

The Joy of Marriage

I have always been taken aback by single people who have the view point that marriage is difficult and needs a lot of hard work. This view may be as a result of personal experiences or misguided conceptions nevertheless, I see a need for it to be arrested in peoples' general thinking.

As a young child I always had a desire to have my own family and to have a healthy, happy relationship with my spouse. This was not because of my immediate environment but in-spite of it. I have been privileged over the years to see really happy marriages and this assured me that my desire is actually people's reality.

As we are told by motivational speakers, what you see is what you get. This is why I believe there is a need for people to see marriage as being positively joyful as opposed to being difficult. 

I do not however, negate the fact that marriage has its unique challenges but I believe the joy of marriage lies in getting through challenges with the person you love and being able to laugh even when the going is tough. 

For me being married to my soul mate is my greatest happiness. 

Feminism....???

Even though I can describe myself as positively feminist (i.e I agree with views which promote women's ability to contribute to the broader society), I do find myself agreeing to the above quote.

Men and women are two peas in a pod each needing the other to reach optimum capacity. Hence I do not agree with statements like, "What a man can do, a woman can do better". We are individually gifted and are able to perform different roles in life and in our relationships.

I believe women should embrace their roles as wives and mothers in a more positive way because the nature and character of future generations depends a lot on us. King David of the Bible followed the example of his mother in his service to God (Psalm 86: 16). 

This does not mean women do not have a role in business or any career however, it often is a choice on what area of your life can take more hits. I hope it is not the home front when I am faced with those choices.

What's in a name?

I totally love my name and I feel like it defines me in more ways than one. I used to write my name on pieces of paper just because I love my name.

Whenever I said the name Jennifer Opene, it felt good. Having adopted a new surname through marriage I feel like I have adopted a different personality. This informs me that a name really defines you.

As parents we occupy the unique position of giving our children their identity for life just by naming them. I wonder what the children given the names below think.

Unusual girls' names
· Archita
· Blip
· Blue
· Creedence
· Duda
· Feline
· Kalliope
· Kinzly
· Kukua
· Nyx
· Viggo


Unusual boys' names
· Anibal
· Braulio
· Cadence
· Cheese
· Cub
· Egypt
· Hurricane
· Kodiak
· Legend
· Panda

I think celebrities do give the weirdest names. I have a few below.

Nicholas Cage: Kal-El

Jason Lee: Pilot Inspektor

Bog Geldof: Fifi Trixibelle

Sylvester Stallone: Sage Moonblood

Penn Jillette: Moxie Crimefighter

Jermaine Jackson: Jermajesty

What names are you likely to give your child?